Match Made in Heaven?

Finding the perfect domestic helper is like trying to find the Holy Grail; next to impossible. But yet we never fail to strive to find the perfect helper who can handle the housework, caring of children and elderly the way WE work in a corporate company. So we search, pay money and change a helper everytime she does not comply to our orders. How far away are we from that domestic helper. Being an employee and being an employer takes on very different roles. Being in charge of a employee who inextricably becomes part of your family as she takes care of your children and your house. Hence, understanding that sticky gray area of sympathy, apathy, discipline, and expectations would help one to understand a helper and their expectations bringing an enlightenment to finding the match made in heaven for you and your family.

Employee Expectations: Scared

Having heard hundreds of stories of abusement, cheated of their pay or even scammed off their down payment money, many fresh domestic helpers come scared yet they come because they want a better life for their loved ones. They may not have even seen a microwave oven or a washing machine. They worry of breaking it and offending their employer. Understanding these genuine fears they carry silently within themselves will be the first step in building the bridge of expectations and achieving them. Give them the confidence to approach you at the outset for as many times it takes for them to be confident and comfortable with their work routine. Set realistic learning curves, it takes one an approximate of 3 months to understand and apply their work; 6 months to be efficient and effective at their work.

Employer Expectations: Be Psychic

We have all been there, the person to magically understand what we need done without having to explain down to every detail. In our haste and impatience, we as employers tend to give mixed instructions where we say something and later we unconsciously rectified it in our mind but verbally forgot to tell our helper. The helper then ends up mucking up the task letting herself in for a talking to. Take the opportunity to set realistic and clear KPI for your helper, yes KPI. This helps you as the employer and the helper to reach each other’s expectations and so a happy routine is set with no “invisible/psychic” instructions or expectations

Employer Expectations: Child Abuse

Every parent’s waking nightmare and haunting grim reaper, the fear the helper to whom the children are entrusted will be hurt. It is sad that such cases do occur time to time, but don’t taint all helpers with the same brush. Though trust can be built, it is always wise to be cautious but not suspicious. Give your helper a chance to prove themselves, the way we strive to get a chance to shine in the corporate world. Observe silently and give the due credit which adds an intangible hold on the helper during emotional situations when arguments and fights occur. Encourage your helpers to understand and reciprocate a healthy way to vent their frustrations and emotions; the methodology being individualistic.

Furthermore not intentionally spoiling children, parents are unconsciously giving the invisible message that children’s additional requests and orders are also to be adhered to. Don’t get me wrong, simple requests are fine, but do not deliver instructions through your children for the expectations behind the message maybe distorted and the This also gives a frustrated and vengeful helper the idea that hurting the children is how they avenge themselves and feel the heady power of being in charge to hurt their employer. Children should be taught to respect and treat their helper well, and yet confident to confide to their parents those who abuse your trust.